Detnet Biographies

Christian Neuhaus
picture of Christian Email:
Webpage: None
Occupation: Proposal writer
Birthday: December 18, 1974
Education: English (UW-Madison) City: Madison, WI
Book of Christian comedy writer

Christian Neuhaus came to Detling as a freshman in the Fall of 1993. His first year was for the most part uneventful, distinguished primarily by his renting videos for Movie Night, and the production of his brief sketch "John Detling: House Fellow" (featuring Christian, Aziz Poonawalla, and Jon Weyers) at the end-of-the-year lip sync. Indeed, Christian left Detling in the Spring of 94 convinced that the tall, lanky frequent visitor to Detling was named Chris Siefolt.

Christian's sophomore year, spent as the roommate of returning Detling luminary Johnny Chang, was certainly more distinctive. Christian developed a curious obsession with the fictitious film "Honors Society Chicks Unchained." He appropriated Johnny's message board for the "On the next 'Detling House'" plot summaries, notable for their pioneering use of the phrase "wackiness ensues." The message board also served as one of the battlgrounds for an ongoing battle of wits involving Christian and future Movie Night Maven Meredith Geller, a battle the former was forced to concede at Detling's Thanksgiving dinner.

The Neuhaus-Geller melee was also significant for the first appearance of what was to become Christian's most infamous contribution to Detling House: the Louis and Lestat photo. Every Sunday night, Christian would give the famously moody vampires (and occasionally the actors portaying them) new pieces of "dialogue," a tradition which as maintained until the end of the Spring 95 semester. No installment seemed to match the popularity of the early exchange "Look at that gluttonous swine! He's eating all the Cheez Whiz!"/ "Tonight he dies," which Christian later had made into a T-shirt.

During the Spring 95 semester, Christian's last on Detling, Christian took an introductory video production course. For his final project (his first was a pre-credit sequence for "John Detling: House Fellow") Christian enlisted Detling residents and Sellery Hall locations to create "Wesley Dilligas and the Dorm Aesthetic," which was shown at the final Movie Night of the semester.

Christian graduated from UW-Madison in May 1997, earning a degree in English with a Creative Writing emphasis; one of his stories featured a character named Johnny Aziz, another took place in Detling, Wisconsin. In March 98, he was called out of caption-writing retirement by Chris Wiemer and Johnny Chang to provide material for the Kim Stahl-Den Huff wedding photos. As of this writing he hopes to show, through ongoing examples, that a drugfree churchgoing virgin can have a place in the arts.

-Christian Neuhaus